Normally I’m a much happier recipient of ‘the Mondays.’ I know it’s not a common thing, but I’ve written about it before. The getting back to schedule, the quiet, the higher percentage of the coffee pot…. yea that’s right, I’m selfish that way. The last couple weeks, even though those reasons still hold true, Monday’s haven’t been easy.
A lot of school-aged-kid-parents will celebrate when their little ones start going back for 5 days a week of being occupied somewhere else BY someone else. Truly, after a summer of almost pulling your hair out from stress trying to keep em occupied (or at least keep them from wringing each others throats from boredom or sibling annoyance) it’s amazing to get back to normal. Still there are quite a few drawbacks like early mornings, busier schedules, different rules and much more active little brains and bodies. Even the most active, healthy and well adjusted parent can be running through some hoops while their child/ren is/are adjusting to a new school year.
Mondays are by far the most difficult part of that adjustment. The kids are coming down from their weekend… aka MINI summer vacation where it’s still warm enough to play outside, eat ice cream and stay up late in the sunshine. In our case it also meant extra treats, late hours and hyper activity because they were with Grandma and Grandpa because Mom and Dad had obligations they signed on for months ago. It also means on top of normal Mommy duties like make sure kid are up, getting ready, brushing hair, making beds, I have to manage myself …all by myself. Just like the kids, after an unfortunately busier than usual couple of days (and if you’ve been keeping track of how horse-shitty I’ve been feeling, busy in no way is a good thing) its harder than usual to get all the USUAL stuff done.
A few tears from Princess and her Rapunzel like locks, a rushed very Snap and Crakle but light on the Pop breakfast for the kidlets and the oldest two are off on the bus and it’s just Little dude and I here with a mounting pile of shit to do and a busy day ahead. This feels like the most Monday- E-est Monday….ever.
My brain has to somehow kick into gear and be able to read words….yea that’s right, like more than one….in a row…forming sentences, then maybe if we’re lucky paragraphs. Whole articles are the goal. I still haven’t settled on what pain medication I want to move forward with talking to the doc about and time is ticking away, my follow up appointment is early this afternoon. I’ve been taken off anything with an NSAID in it and unfortunately that rules out not only every over the counter option other than acetaminophen (which on its own does shit all and we knew that already) and even when delving into the world of stronger narcotic options a lot of them are mixed with ibuprofen or aspirin, many are mixed with acetaminophen which while isn’t causing a raging amount of extra damage on my digestive tract does have quite an extensive amount of research on it and liver damage. Then you have the opiates themselves…that’s a shit-show of controversy and all sorts of over standards I’m just not willing to delve into, but I will say that they work and at this point in my case they are necessary. I’m just having a little trouble deciding which way to go.
Dr GP wants to go with oxycodone (7.5 mg with 325 mg acetaminophen) extended release. While I like the idea of not having to pop pain pills every 3-4 hours on a bad day because they wear off so damn fast, I’ve always been blatantly honest with him that I prefer to go the route of using narcotics only for breakthrough pain and trying to find other avenues for round the clock relief (like why I’m putting up with the Topamax side effects). Extended release are meant to be taken on a schedule, not as needed. Oxycodone itself is also the most highly sought after addictive prescription substance here in Canada. It’s not that I don’t already have proof of my own ability to self regulate and keep dependence in check, but with a few substance abusers already in the family…it doesn’t hurt to be at least a tiny bit wary….autoimmune disease runs in the family, addiction may too.
Honestly it’s probably why I’m being such a weirdo about it in general. I don’t like talking about narcotic pain options at all with the good docs. I feel like I’m channeling my mom or worse yet, that they’re going to look at me like I’ve seen doctors, family members or random strangers on the bus look at her over the years during her worst times. I know how much help they can be and I know there are many people out there that depend on them (DEPENDENCE IS NOT ADDICTION) for quality of life and to be able to function and enjoy mobility and sanity away from a life in complete and utter agony. I just never thought I’d be one of them. I figured Advil would always be good enough for inflammation, or that some mix of supplements and diet would put lupus in its place and on a bad day a couple t3s would really kick pains ass.
Fuck….well too late. You know how I didn’t want to delve into it….I knew I’d have to walk the plank.
It may be a crapola Monday revolving around doctors, prescriptions, pain and housecleaning but it’s also International Talk Like a Pirate Day! Normally this would mean a particularly swashbuckly meal, dress up and of course some Kraken (one of the best dark rums on the market), but this weekend revolved around a different kind of shine (not everything that glitters is gold ya know?) we almost forgot about today.
It may instead be spaghetti with or without meatballs (depends on if the hands can roll with it or not) night with a glass of shiraz, our first evening with one of Buddy’s friends over for a play date (please Goddess let it be a quiet friend going on day…we’ve lost count of the on and off again migraine) and what is shaping up to be a pretty epic thunderstorm if the radar is correct. There’s still one way to make it at least a tad more Sea-worthy.