Ok so confession time. Hypocritical behavior is probably my biggest pet peeve. In fact it’s much more than something I find irritating or annoying, it downright offends me. At least when it comes to the people around me that practice it fully aware of how askew their behavior is in comparison to all the crap they spout.
Unfortunately I tend to find myself among a lot of these types over the years. I like opinionated people, I like to debate and to learn from other people’s differences or to rant on with someone who feels the same way I do. Some of the people who I initially think are vibrant virtuous (in their own individual ways) people end up being wolves in sheep’s clothing. They talk the talk alright, but they sure as hell don’t walk the walk.
I grew up in a community where being different, asking questions or wanting something more out of life and faith was a huge NO NO. Yet I was taught God loved me no matter what and that he loved me for ME. Being a preacher’s daughter also gave me a full wide window to see all the hidden behaviors of people that while may put a good check into the collection plate on Sunday, don’t act very by the good book the rest of the week. Since I’m pretty sure the big man upstairs isn’t the hypocrite, that left me learning that there’s something different between religious beliefs and true moral integrity.
I am well aware that this is a sin that we all commit from time to time, in little doses. We usually don’t even notice. Or we have what we consider a good reason for not matching what we say with what we do.
Does that make ME a hypocrite? Well it sure does. I’m sure there are a more than a few occasions where my actions don’t quite add up with my beliefs, opinions and especially my feelings (I’m talking about all those “I’m fine”s us invisible illness troopers tend to spout out). I’ve told my kids no treats before supper after munching down some M&M’s. I’ve told Mr. Mango that the silent treatment is the stupidest form of bad communication but I’ve walked off more than once in a quiet rage and refused to talk for hours. I’ve spent years accumulating good healthy habits and being ‘honest about’ how my dietary changes have changed my life and now I’m living on almost only gluten filled sugary treats. Ya know what though, I can admit it all.
When you admit your sins or mistakes and own up to not being perfect, it no longer makes you a hypocrite. It just makes you fallible. Which by the way, we all are.
We all fault at times. What really bugs me, are the people who can’t admit it. Pride is a real fucker, and it’s the proud people that tend to be the most hypocritical of all. Its not that they don’t believe they have faults, its that they’re going to try their damned hardest to not let anyone else see them.
As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned to do two things. First is to try and ignore hypocritical behavior when possible. People either don’t notice that their doing it or they think you won’t notice that they’re doing it. I may be opinionated but I really don’t want to argue over someone else’s morals or standards. Second is to just walk away.
I have lost many a ‘friend’ over the years simply because I can only tolerate a certain amount of bullshit. In the end, it’s made me a better person and it’s made it so I can actually interact with other more real people on my and their own terms.
That isn’t to say I don’t deal with hypocritical behavior still and it still drives me absolutely bonkers. Yesterday was one of those days that completely filled up my bullshit meter.
So still, my comment stands.