Yesterday was a ‘sick’ day. Not only am I still recovering from how busy last week was but my general anxiety has been difficult to deal with all day every day and the fear of when the next panic attack will hit makes every moment feel like I’m walking on thin ice, not knowing when it’ll crack.
Being both physically and mentally exhausted is…. exhausting. There really isn’t another word I have to put there. If Little Dude didn’t get a bunch of new exciting things to play with, I don’t know if I would have been able to manage the day with him.
By the time supper was over with I was ready to hit the hay, but Mr. Mango had other plans. He didn’t make it in to the gym in the morning and felt stiff, sore and just inactive. I can sympathize that sitting all day (like he has to do at work) can be rough and agreed that a short walk to the water and back was something I could handle.
I’m so glad I did.
There is still a crisp bite to the air, but it felt wonderful out. This was officially our first family walk of the year (at least one that didn’t involve multiple layers of warm clothes with only two little eye holes to peer out of).
Little Dude is still getting used to his big red wagon, while the stroller is easier in a lot of ways, this baby makes it through thick and thin (by that I mean mud, puddles, you name it) not to mention it even has skis to try out next winter!
I can honestly say it was the best my mind had felt in days. Like a weight was temporarily lifted.
To think in a month or so, our little town will be bustling with tourists. We have a very short time in between the dead of winter and the heat of summer where we feel almost like in a ghost town. Some how it feels comforting. Eerie but comforting.
My body kept up pretty well I think. A few times my legs would cramp up or go numb and I’d fall behind a little. I didn’t mind, the benefit of the fresh air, family time and ease on my mind was far worth the physical strain.
All the melted snow and rain has added up. The kids loved seeing our usually slow and calm creek turn into a raging stream. A mix of wonderment and fear. It brings back memories of when I was young and some of my favorite learning experiences were on random walks, hikes or camping trips.
As it slowly started to get dark, we quickly headed home while there was still some heat from the sun. It was the perfect way to end what otherwise would have been a bad day. Some new memories and some excitement for the summer to come.
It didn’t fix anything, but it did help. For a brief time my mind went quiet and I wasn’t stuck thinking about the next time panic will hit and I ended up getting more sleep last night than I have in weeks.